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THE ONLINE INTERNATIONAL DATING AGENCY BLUES

The Winter Olympic Games in Russia is upon us, perfect opportunity to do a Russian style song! Here we look at the international online dating scene, more traps than you can shake a ski at, incidentally the song Hava Nagila was originally a Romanian folk song, so it's all keeping it in Eastern Europe, hunt carefully, boys! (-;.

Guitar - Perfecto
Bass - Violin Bass
Percussion - Jingle Ring
All Vocals Slowpaw Steve T

INTRO - I WAS LONELY I WAS ON MY OWN,
I NEEDED COMPANY NOT JUST STUCK AT HOME.
TRIED SPEED DATING AND GOT NOWHERE FAST,
THE INTERNET IT SEEMED LIKE SUCH A BLAST.
GOT ON MY COMPUTER AND I PAID MY FEE,
WASN'T SURE WHAT WAS WAITING FOR ME...

FOUND A LADY ON THE WORLD WIDE WEB,
NOT A SLAPPER BUT WAS SURE NO DEB.
SAID SHE'S COMIN' OVER FOR A WHILE,
SHE REALLY KNEW HOW TO MAKE ME SMILE.
THEN SHE DROPPED A BOMBSHELL, MADE ME WEEP,
THE WORDS SHE WROTE ME MADE ME LOSE MY SLEEP...

"MY NAME MARIKA, I FROM LATVIA,
I NOT MEET YOU 'CAUSE MY MOTHER IS SICK,
NEED OPERATION, OH PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE,
I NEED TWENTY THOUSAND EUROS QUICK !

INTRO REPEAT

FOUND A LADY ON A NEW WEB SITE,
SEEMED OK AND THINGS WERE GOING RIGHT,
SHE LIKED DANCING AND IF THINGS WERE BRIGHT,
SHE'D LIKE TO MEET ME ON AN AIRPORT FLIGHT.
THEN SHE DROPPED A CLANGER MADE ME WEEP,
THESE WORDS SHE WROTE THEY MADE ME SKIP A BEAT...

"MY NAME IS ANNA, I AM FROM RUSSIA,
I WANT TO MEET YOU IN THE UK QUICK,
I NEED PLANE TICKET, OH PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE,
I NEED TWENTY THOUSAND ROUBLES QUICK !"

INTRO REPEAT...

FOUND A LADY ON 'GIRLS GALORE',
WENT FOR 'CASUAL' FOUND A WHOLE LOT MORE.
SHE SAID SHE LOVED ME AND WOULD ALWAYS BE
MY LITTLE DARLIN' AND WOULD MARRY ME.
THEN SHE DROPPED A BOMBSHELL MADE ME SAD,
THER WORDS SHE TOLD ME MADE ME LOSE MY RAG...

"MY NAME IS LUKA, I FROM ARMENIA,
I REALLY LOVE YOU BUT MY MOTHER IS SICK,
NEED OPERATION, OH PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE,
I NEED TWENTY THOUSAND EUROS QUICK !"

I'M SO HAPPY LIVING ON MY OWN,
DON'T NEED COMPANY I ENJOY MY OWN.
THE INTERNET IS NOW A THING OF THE PAST,
MY COMPUTER GOT THROWN IN THE TRASH.
THEN MY MOTHER CALLED AND MADE ME WEEP,
THE WORDS SHE SAID THEY MADE ME LOSE MY SLEEP...

"I AM YOUR MOTHER, YOUR DEAR OLD MOTHER,
I REALLY LOVE YOU BUT I AM SO SICK,
NEED OPERATION, OH PLEASE HELP ME PLEASE,
I NEED TWENTY THOUSAND EUROS QUICK...!"

OH, MOTHER RUSSIA...WHAT YOU DO TO ME...?

Words and music (except Trad.) by Steve Trowbridge February 2014.
From forthcoming album "Folk of Oak" release soon.

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Comment by Willardj on February 9, 2014 at 11:15am: GREAT SONG.....If it has tires or tits on it your gonna have a problem.....

Comment by Nancy kat on February 9, 2014 at 10:25am

Comment by Nancy kat on February 9, 2014 at 10:24am: lol S~Paw~St love the high voice!!! Mmeeeeooowwwww^^

Comment by Jason Mills on February 9, 2014 at 9:48am: Good one Steve!!! Loved it!! :>)

Comment by Slowpaw Steve T on February 9, 2014 at 9:06am: many thanks! the water is full of sharks out there - swim safely! (-;

Comment by BUGGY (C) on February 9, 2014 at 8:03am

Comment by BUGGY (C) on February 9, 2014 at 7:57am

Comment by BUGGY (C) on February 9, 2014 at 7:47am: Steve you are awesome...your song says it all... Genius!

Comment by Diglydog on February 9, 2014 at 7:25am: Great stuff Steve !!

Hey, this is no problem. You just reply to the emails from those chaps in Lagos. Let their cousin use your bank account to bring some money into the UK. When you get your 'commission', you can use it to pay for the operations and air tickets. What could possibly go wrong ?