Gear Installation - What's Left, Right?? - Forums

Ok, here it is in full, with no gaps:

As The Worm Turns (with apologies to Dr. Suess, Robert Service, Rudyard Kipling, and soap opera TV)

The twangers and bangers did all gather round
To cuss and discuss the details of their sound.
But one thing that stumped both the bright and infirm
Was the why and the which of the turn of the worm.

While some scratched their headstocks, and others their nuts,
The rest filed advice couched in ifs, ands, or buts.
"No skin off my nose," said the one with thick derm,
"I don't give a damn 'bout the turn of the worm!"

"I've never had failures, I've never had breaks;
This ain't like the Parsi Man's dreadful mistakes.
I just pops 'em in 'til they stand proud and firm -
Who cares how the string meets the turn of the worm?"

But then from the back of the crowd of onlookers
A small wispy voice hushed the sinners and hookers:
"My name is Twice Twister, from Hole-Under-Berm;
You must all heed my warning 'bout how turns the worm!"

The fiddle-dee dermed one, whose nose was unskint,
Found his smiling face freezing, somewhat set like flint;
The Twister's alarm gripped his ears like a germ,
With its repeated rubric of how turns the worm:

"The string should swing sweetly, inside of the post,
And go through the hole like a Z, not a ghost,
While the wraps should wrap downward, not curled like a perm,
So the gear, with less stress, teethes the turn of the worm."

"Therefore, the post should stand both firm and proud,
But nearest the nut," intoned Twice to the crowd,
More ingenious than Pratchett's famed Leonard of Quirm:
"The key must be headward to help turn the worm."

The flinty-faced fiddler, that seller of song
Of how it don't matter, that there was no "wrong,"
Responded, half-hissing, full-hoping he'd squirm,
While he twisted Twice Twister's turn-tale of the worm.

"Mister Twister," he said, "if what you say is true,
Then please explain why my way works like it do,
For it violates every Twice Twister term;
It simply don't matter which way turns the worm!"

Like a tennis match, back and forth, all day it went:
The Twisting of Twice Twister's calm argument.
But adamantine, like a rock he stood firm,
Awash in the current of how turns the worm.

Toward sundown, Twice Twister produced a necked box,
And proceeded to twist on some strings, in his socks;
As the twang tension mounted, the hookers did squirm,
For they'd intimate knowledge of the turn of the worm.

Then he handed it, tuned, to the treasonous one
Who, crowd-tempted, tried to twist Twice for fun.
Twice silently motioned him notes to affirm,
Thus playfully testing his turn of the worm.

The fiddlestick four-flusher sourly complied
Wondering what trick might be hiding inside.
But the notes jangled tuneful, without any Sturm
Or Drang to destabilize Twice Twister's worm.

Abashed, he handed the box back to Twice,
Who proceeded to bend, hammer on, slide like ice.
The lesson thus learned, it was his turn to squirm,
As he choked on his diet of Twice Twisted worm.

Replies

Richard Rose September 25, 2013 at 10:28am

Thanks for bringing this up. Might make us Noobs tuners last longer. "Worms away from the nut" or "Gears toward the bridge". How about "Pull your worm toward the cog" ? Ha! , maybe not. Makes perfect mechanical sense to me.
John Sawyer September 24, 2013 at 5:27pm

I am relatively new to the whole cbg scene, but I can tell you the one tuner I mounted 'wrong' is the one string I have to adjust the most. Wrong being gear away from the string tension... the other thing I discovered is that a lefty peg sticks out to the left when looking at the underside, or gear side of the head...

The stupid things you learn the hard way....
Yankee Dog September 24, 2013 at 1:10pm

All this about pulling the gears together is all well and good. It even makes sense. But I find it more important to make sure the tuners all turn in the same direction when tuning. After that I want the strings to have as straight a path to the nut as possible. Also, head design influences tuner placement.

So given that I am often digging the parts box and using the machines I have a available. The whole idea just doesnt always work out.
Ron "Oily" Sprague September 22, 2013 at 3:20am

Ok, here it is in full, with no gaps:

As The Worm Turns (with apologies to Dr. Suess, Robert Service, Rudyard Kipling, and soap opera TV)

The twangers and bangers did all gather round
To cuss and discuss the details of their sound.
But one thing that stumped both the bright and infirm
Was the why and the which of the turn of the worm.

While some scratched their headstocks, and others their nuts,
The rest filed advice couched in ifs, ands, or buts.
"No skin off my nose," said the one with thick derm,
"I don't give a damn 'bout the turn of the worm!"

"I've never had failures, I've never had breaks;
This ain't like the Parsi Man's dreadful mistakes.
I just pops 'em in 'til they stand proud and firm -
Who cares how the string meets the turn of the worm?"

But then from the back of the crowd of onlookers
A small wispy voice hushed the sinners and hookers:
"My name is Twice Twister, from Hole-Under-Berm;
You must all heed my warning 'bout how turns the worm!"

The fiddle-dee dermed one, whose nose was unskint,
Found his smiling face freezing, somewhat set like flint;
The Twister's alarm gripped his ears like a germ,
With its repeated rubric of how turns the worm:

"The string should swing sweetly, inside of the post,
And go through the hole like a Z, not a ghost,
While the wraps should wrap downward, not curled like a perm,
So the gear, with less stress, teethes the turn of the worm."

"Therefore, the post should stand both firm and proud,
But nearest the nut," intoned Twice to the crowd,
More ingenious than Pratchett's famed Leonard of Quirm:
"The key must be headward to help turn the worm."

The flinty-faced fiddler, that seller of song
Of how it don't matter, that there was no "wrong,"
Responded, half-hissing, full-hoping he'd squirm,
While he twisted Twice Twister's turn-tale of the worm.

"Mister Twister," he said, "if what you say is true,
Then please explain why my way works like it do,
For it violates every Twice Twister term;
It simply don't matter which way turns the worm!"

Like a tennis match, back and forth, all day it went:
The Twisting of Twice Twister's calm argument.
But adamantine, like a rock he stood firm,
Awash in the current of how turns the worm.

Toward sundown, Twice Twister produced a necked box,
And proceeded to twist on some strings, in his socks;
As the twang tension mounted, the hookers did squirm,
For they'd intimate knowledge of the turn of the worm.

Then he handed it, tuned, to the treasonous one
Who, crowd-tempted, tried to twist Twice for fun.
Twice silently motioned him notes to affirm,
Thus playfully testing his turn of the worm.

The fiddlestick four-flusher sourly complied
Wondering what trick might be hiding inside.
But the notes jangled tuneful, without any Sturm
Or Drang to destabilize Twice Twister's worm.

Abashed, he handed the box back to Twice,
Who proceeded to bend, hammer on, slide like ice.
The lesson thus learned, it was his turn to squirm,
As he choked on his diet of Twice Twisted worm.
- RTZGUITARS > Ron "Oily" Sprague September 24, 2013 at 1:40am
  - Ron "Oily" Sprague > RTZGUITARS September 24, 2013 at 10:44am
    
    Yer tryin' to tell me somethin', aren't ya...
    - jawbone > Ron "Oily" Sprague September 24, 2013 at 12:32pm
      
      Do you suppose "That's a lotta Bull"
      - Ron "Oily" Sprague > jawbone September 24, 2013 at 4:31pm
        
        Well, RTZ knows I'm a Texan, went to UT-Austin for one of my degrees, and that the Longhorn is the UT mascot. Perhaps he is merely envious...>:-E
        
        the anonymous pick > Ron "Oily" Sprague September 24, 2013 at 4:59pm
        
        or horny :-}
        
        jawbone > the anonymous pick September 24, 2013 at 5:33pm
        
        Well now I'm blushing!!!
        :-)

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