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SO... A DUCK WALKS INTO A HARDWARE STORE .....

A duck walks into a hardware store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- ummm "No." this is a hardware store .. we sell hardware stuff .
- "Got any fresh oranges or apples ?"
- "No.! I just told you , this is a hardware store .
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "No." !!!!
- "Got any oranges or apples ?"
- "No.!!!! I told you yesterday, we don’t sell that stuff here ! and If you come back tomorrow and ask me the same question, I'll nail your flippers to the floor so you get the hint !!!"
the next day, the duck walks in and asks:
- "Got any nails?"
- "NO!!!!."
- "Got any fresh fruit?"

this is just one of those lil jokes that stick with ya .. you may find yourself chuckling about it in an hour from now .. even rehearsing it later tonight .. not sure why , or what it is about this joke ,, but its addictive .. so i thought i'd share .

you can thank me or blame me later

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 6, 2015 at 2:26am

lol

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Permalink Reply by nailtown slim on March 6, 2015 at 2:28am

I hate supermarket shopping with my wife, she keeps disappearing, she should be in the S.A.S. the enemy would never find her in a million years! We were in the supermarket the other day and she'd been missing for about twenty minutes when a lovely looking lady walked past, I said 'excuse me, I've lost my wife around here somewhere, could you talk to me for a couple of minutes please'? She said 'oohh bless, are you lonely then'? I said 'no, but every time I talk to a pretty woman, my wife appears like magic'!

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 27, 2015 at 12:07pm

:-)

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Permalink Reply by Pascal on March 26, 2015 at 7:11am

a couple married for years just had thier fourth baby. the first three are very beautifull girls but the fourth girl is as ugly as a donkeys butt.

"i don't understand" sais the husband "did you cheat on me"

"not this time" the wife replies

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 26, 2015 at 7:17am

;-)

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Permalink Reply by nailtown slim on March 26, 2015 at 8:25am

Pat came home drunk and saw his wife sitting at the table with two of her friends looking at family photographs, He smiled and said 'hello my darling wife, and mother of three lovely kids'! She smiled an even bigger smile than his and said 'hello my lovely husband, father of one'!

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 26, 2015 at 8:30am

:-o

lol

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Permalink Reply by TN Twang on March 27, 2015 at 9:37am

TCP/IP packet walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a glass of beer."

Bartender says, "So, you'd like a glass of beer?"

Packet says, "Yes, I'd like a glass of beer."

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 27, 2015 at 10:34am

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Permalink Reply by nailtown slim on March 27, 2015 at 12:42pm

Many a true word spoken in jest mate! I met my first wife in a club, I saw her standing by the bar, looking bored, and I just stared at her for a few minutes until She turned around and saw me! I went over and said those immortal words, 'Hey, I thought you were at home looking after our kids'?

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Permalink Reply by the anonymous pick on March 27, 2015 at 1:19pm

ohhhhh

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Permalink Reply by darryl kernaghan on March 27, 2015 at 11:22am

little Johnny listens as his teacher says,'only humans stutter,no other animal in the world does'.Little Johnny thinks a bit,then shouts out,'that's not true,the other day i was playing with my cat on the porch,the neighbours rottweiller came along and my cat arched his back and went 'FFFFFF!FFFFFF!,FFFFFFF!' and before he could say F*£%! the dog ate him!'