Broken Sparrow

Comment

Comment by Slowpaw Steve T on June 5, 2012 at 2:03am

Simple but powerful Blues lyrics and riff, it would be very effective if the first verse was played quietly as it is, then....Pow ! ...heavy Blues mayhem!   This is a great song and it needs to fly...!  good work Grease (-:

Comment by Grease Stains on June 4, 2012 at 6:50pm

Also; Bones, it'll be okay man!

And Clock? where does that Stout come from? i got a buddy that would probably love to try it! lol.

Comment by Grease Stains on June 4, 2012 at 6:48pm

thanks for taking the time to listen and for the advice folks!

Oily,

i've always been more of a fan of the "idea" of singing than actually singing. i have some buddy's i used to jam with regularly, and they are fantastic singers, so i was always extremely happy to let them do it. i didn't realize how quiet the audio was on this, i run my computer through my tv, and have a half decent sound system... so my bad on that. the booze is kind part fuel part lube. it wouldn't occur to me to sing with out and, and i need a little extra to even consider trying. i have noticed tho, i loose the small bit of range i have if i take that "double shot over the line". hah, yeah anyone that's played hockey with me or some who managed to piss me off can tell you i'll holler like a bull horn.

i'm very pleased you liked the git and my playing, means a lot thanks man.

yes, i've tired to record myself singing with and without music. not a fan of my voice (people tell me that normal tho.). not much for singing in the shower, and i suppose i sing the odd time on the highway. if i'm in traffic, normally i've got Slayer, or one of my many favourite metal bands cranked. i've noticed people tend to avoid eye contact for some reason. heh. i have over the years tried a bit of singing here and there and recorded myself. to be honest the difference between what i though i sounded like, and what i sound like jumped out fast! hah. i've noticed as well i tend to do better with a speaking(?) style, so when someone does convince me to sing at a party i'll sing a lot of john prine songs, or the like. 

  i'll certainly consider the advice tho. perhaps with some practice i may find a range yet. to re-enforce you last point two of my favourite singer off the top of my head are Townes and Lemmy. hah. and again, thank you very much for taking the time to respond. this is one thing i love about the nation, everyone is willing to help!

Comment by Sharecropper (Joel) on June 4, 2012 at 6:22pm

 Cool song !  I think the volume on your vocals is fine . Suits the song .  My only advice is give us another song !!! 

Comment by Ron "Oily" Sprague on June 4, 2012 at 2:23pm

Grease,

Finally got to hear all of this by turning the sound full up and getting my ear near the speaker. You got a good voice for this, but I agree with John. You got a big torso (so do I) which means you have a big resonating chamber for your diaphragm muscles to work on. Use 'em! Your delivery is also kinda breathy, which would work with this if you could get your mouth right up next to a good recording mic, like maybe swallowing an SM 58 - I know, not possible with the crappy condenser mics on most video cameras - and that may be the reason this could be even better. The emotion is definitely in your voice: let it out! If you are drinking Jack (and believe me, it used to take me 3 beers just to be able to get on stage, to squelch the stage fright), realize that alcohol does a number on your vocal cords; I now tend to save the imbibing for after the gig, or recording session (but sometimes, I get as loosey-goosey as the next guy). 35 years of playing and singing in public, in both bars and churches, and acting on stage, mostly unamplified, as well as coaching and umpiring baseball ( sometimes, ya gotta be heard across a coupla acres of outfield ;-) ), has taught me to at least try to take care of my throat to get the most and best out of it.

This is a good song. You got good lyrics; the fact that James said this sounds familiar is a good thing, means you tapped into the feeling behind the words, and that resonates with people. Your playing is fine on this; I like the slow vibe, and your fingering's clean. The git's got good tone. So work on the vocal delivery. Have you recorded your voice without accompaniment? Do you like the sound of your own voice? Do you sing in the shower, or in the car? Do you care if someone in traffic busts you when you're screaming your favorite song at the top of your lungs at a stop light? Have you played your recorded voice back to yourself, so you can hear that it's different than how you sound to you in your head? It took me almost 3 years to get used to the sound of my recorded voice, and I spent lots of that time with a tape deck, playing myself back to myself. Try it, if you haven't done this before; it can be a revelation. You may not like what you hear initially, but don't let that hold you back. Many of the world's greatest singer-songwriters are definitely not good technical singers; but they've learned to use their unique vocal idiosyncrasies to their best advantage.

Comment by Low Budget Luthier on June 4, 2012 at 1:47pm

nice tune, think ill go kill myself now--------ha!

Comment by wes carl on June 4, 2012 at 10:56am

nice song - I agree with UJ - a little louder *****

Comment by James on June 4, 2012 at 10:04am

those  lyrics sound so familiar! nice playing , and singing !!!

Comment by Uncle John on June 4, 2012 at 8:40am

Back again Stains.   That guitar pattern was stuck in my head.  Good stuff.  

Comment by Uncle John on June 4, 2012 at 7:37am

Stains, that is a good song, good lyrics and nice playing.  

You asked for suggestions, so here is mine.  You sang it well, but too softly.   Get your yeah yeahs out and project it.   Use the diaphragm muscles and sing out.  That can take this from good to excellent.  You don't want to scream it - just out volume the git.

Good on you, bro.

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